Tag Archives: Blogging

On Josh Duggar; or How Can You Mend a Broken Heart

One of my FB friends “liked” a post by someone else which mentioned something about Josh Duggar molesting some girls when he was a teen. Piqued my curiosity, so I went looking for deets.

I have heard of the television show but have never watched it, nor would I be interested in it at all. I do not follow the Duggars in any form, nor look to them as any source of information, education, or anything that I would desire. So, let’s just get that straight. OK.

I visited a couple of websites to see what the story is that is being reported. And I read some of the comments. My initial response to both the story and the comments is grief at the brokenness that is part of a boy who would act out like he did, grief at the shame and pain that the girls would have experienced, no matter how they were counseled afterwards, and grief that people feel so very free to condemn josh duggar, his parents, his beliefs, christianity, christians, and anyone who would dare to suggest that someone like josh duggar deserves anything other than a slow death by the most painful means possible.

My response to the story is this. I DON’T KNOW all the details, and therefore really cannot speak to it other than to say I do believe that healing exists and occurs relative to sexual molestation, and I do believe that forgiveness exists and occurs when people hurt other people. Which means, even though I don’t know what happened and where all of the players are now, I believe that healing and forgiveness are truly possible.

Josh Duggar is outside of the scope of any legal ramifications, from what I understand, but the School of Life has certainly brought an opportunity to him to face up to and take responsibility for the choice to hide something so serious, and to take responsibility for his future course regarding being in a position of authority in an area where he may still very much have deep wounds.

Blogging about these things opens me up to expressing my thoughts as well as being in a position to receive comments from readers who disagree, or agree, or a little of both. I had the opportunity to interact on Facebook about my post from yesterday with someone from high school I have not talked with in many years. He is deeply involved in the eastern orthodox church, I believe, and has written several books about politics. The point he made initially confused me, but as I thought I about it, I realized he had a legitimate point and I learned from what he said. Maybe he learned from what I said, too, but sometimes it seems like the more confident one is in one’s beliefs, the harder it is to really listen to someone else’s point of view. At any rate, the interaction was rich and welcome, and I am so glad for the opportunity to interact with people I know and those I do not know in real life via my blog.

Thanks for reading.

How the Week Turned Out

This week, I blogged about the movie Seymour: An Introduction  on Sunday. I’m looking forward to seeing it again in the near future. Seeing that film was truly a highlight of joy in a time that has a passel of challenges.

On Monday, I learned a new word, “quicksticks” and enjoyed using it this week. Kepler in particular benefits from being told to move a little more quickly. No, wait. I benefit from telling him to move a little more quickly. He really doesn’t change anything. It just makes me feel better.

Since I volunteered at Kepler’s school on Monday, I realized that I wanted to change my approach, and blogged about how I see the school teaching to the test, and how I feel that is shortchanging the students, and how I recognize that it is probably nigh unto impossible to do anything else with the amount of bureaucratic red tape public schools are wrapped up in.

Tuesday, I was taken with the poetry bug and wrote a poem about the The Rain of Regret. There are many times when I get bombarded by memories of things I wish I had said differently and done differently. Part of me knows that I was doing the best I could at the time with the information that I had. Part of me feels the pain of regret that it was my best.

Wednesday, I found a great list about self-care, a topic I was very slow to warm to since it sounded too close to “selfish.” All in all, self-care always necessitates a willingness to be a critical thinker. It can be easy to act without thinking, and self-care doesn’t happen that way.

Thursday was a rough day, as I processed the pain of being continually lied to by a drug addict, and how good I am at forgetting the pain of that until it smacks me upside the head again. On Friday, I wrote a part two to that post about the ongoing role my questions of my addict seem to be relevant for me. I had wanted to follow up on Thursday, but had come down with a flu-like illness that laid me low and is still demanding attention.

As a result of being ill, Friday my post on the Universe was short and sweet. Maybe I’ll decide to expand on that one sometime.

Saturday, still focused on getting well, I wrote about Voice, riffing off of an article by Todd Henry, and ending with The Moody Blues’ The Voice.

Among all of this, I read The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up, and did step one of gathering up my clothing from all over the house, and then decided which items to keep by handling each one and deciding if it brought a spark of joy to me. I would say I got rid of half of my clothes, and it really is different to open my closet and see only clothes that bring me joy. I do believe I will be going through the whole pile once more as I know I fudged a few things that didn’t actually create a spark of joy.

A few days were dreary and rainy, and we went back to some colder temperatures this week. This makes the bright, sunny days just that much sweeter. The local high school show choir placed 2nd at nationals (YEA!), which thrilled my daughter, who hopes to join their ranks next year, and I knocked back a few books this week.

Did you have a favorite post this week, either on your own blog, or on mine, or both?

N is for NOT Taken Down by Depression (BONUS POST!)

****ing depression.

It nags at me. Gnaws at me. Nips at my heels. It’s a rock in my shoe. Fingernails on the chalkboard of my soul. An Excedrin-sized headache. Depression is a backpack full of rocks that I do not wish to wear.

My posts this month are about acceptance. So I suppose there is something to be said for being accepting of the lessons I have the opportunity to learn through dealing with depression. But, depression is not my friend, and I hesitate to allow it to have more than the slightest attention as the thoughts that go along with depression pull me down, down, down.

Until I have a solution to the challenge of depression, I intend to stand against allowing it to overtake me more than it already does for short, although always way too long, periods of time.

Considering my posts so far this month, I acknowledge and accept that I am probably all wrong, mostly mistaken and somewhat short-sighted when it comes to how I think about depression. Which is to say, there are no doubt new and improved ways to think about this experience. I acknowledge and accept that the compassion I have developed as a result of having children is the exact kind of compassion I want to extend toward myself always, especially when depression is getting me down.

In my post The Discipline of Determination, I am reminded that it is not the fact of having depression and working on it, but being aware of what the experience is doing to me, to my character. I suspect the piece of Enlightenment that is relevant here is to begin to intentionally listen to my own intuition about depression and my experience of it. For Feast or Famine, I daresay it’s time to embrace both the ups and downs of depression and allow the natural ebb and flow to be part of the experience of having it, and hopefully overcoming it.

Along the same lines as I wrote in Giving Advice, it’s time to get quiet and look inside to see what I might be thinking about being depressed, and allow me to give myself some advice about next steps. In Humanism, I ask the question of what might be possible if I am willing to see the good in others. Is there an application for me regarding depression, I wonder.

Thinking about Randolph Junuh from The Legend of Bagger Vance, how might the burden of depression be part of me stepping into what I am here to do?

As I walked this morning, I noticed an Annie Lennox song running through my brain. Aha, I said, take note and see how this relates to what I am thinking about here. Sometimes it’s a whole lot more important to live with the questions for awhile than to rush toward an answer. At least for now, I accept this part of my life and I look forward to seeing what comes of these juicy musings.

“Dark Road”

It’s a dark road
And a dark way that leads to my house
And the word says
You’re never gonna find me there oh no
I’ve got an open door
It didn’t get there by itself
It didn’t get there by itself

There’s a feelin
But you’re not feelin’ it at all
There’s a meaning
But you’re not listening any more
I look at that open road
I’m gonna walk there by myself

And if you catch me
I might try to run away
You know I can’t be here too long
And if you let me
I might try to make you stay
Seems you never realise a good thing
Till it’s gone..
Maybe im still searchin
But I dont know what it means
All the fires of destruction are still
Burnin’ in my dreams
There’s no water that can wash away
This longin’ to come clean
Hey yea yea….

I cant find the joy within my soul
It’s just sadness takin hold
I wanna come in from the cold
And make myself renewed again
It takes strength to live this way
The same old madness every day
I wanna kick these blues away
I wanna learn to live again…

It’s a dark road
And a dark way that leads to my house
And the word says
You’re never gonna find me there oh no
I’ve got an open door
It didn’t get there by itself
It didn’t get there by itself

The Joy of Blogging

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My first blog began March 24, 2008, at siouxsiesmusings.blogspot.com. It has been primarily an online journal that I have shared with others.

This new blog, ClearingSpace4Joy, is going to be more about you, and less about me. For you this means practical content that you can use today, as well as access to all kinds of parenting and life resources. We will cover topics such as asking powerful questions, focusing on progress rather than perfection, reducing the clutter in our lives, and provide links to other sites of people who offer great value to their readers.

Join me on this journey by subscribing to my blog so that you experience a little more joy in a short amount of time.  I look forward to hearing from you.

In Joy,

Susan